The Secret
Tarot Reading

Similar in form to the Egyptian Cross, the final spread on the site is just what you are looking for, the Secret. Everybody who plays with tarot cards attempting to summon demons is looking for secrets. Of course they only desire this evil occult knowledge in order to 1-up their brothers. They do not love their brothers as themselves, or they would share the knowledge instead of use it to try to make people feel stupid. Oh the ignorance of their folly!

Like the Egyptian Cross spread, the Secret begins with 2 significators. In this case they are read as if they were crossed like in the Celtic Cross. Then above there are 3 chronological cards representing the past, present, and future. They are mystically labeled like the changing moon cycles, as the Secret comes from a dark place.

Cards #6 and 7 are labeled Dark and Light, Dark meaning the dark or emotional side of the issue, and Light conversely meaning the rational side of things. There is not really a final outcome, but there are 2 future cards to show the reader's dark fate, the "Waxing" card #4 already mentioned and the "Next Step" at the base of the spread. This is basically the outcome.

The final card, #9 is only considered part of the reading if it happens to be a Major Arcana card. Any Minor Arcana cards in this position only say that you didn't get a "Secret" this time. Maybe next time the devil's high priestess will be more generous.

Here we have the lizard king sitting on his throne. He is the supreme commander of the entire suit of Wands, the dominant male of the dominant suit of the Minor Arcana. He wears a red robe, as the ruler of the suit of fire. He bears the secret occult symbol of the lizard eating its own tail.

The king sits there as if he owns the world. He appears to be more of a passionate fan of his own work than anything else. He watches the action that he has set in motion play out for his own amusement. Any people under him are his pawns.

Whatever his whims, it is certain that the people will be the ones who bear the brunt of his decisions. Where this card appears in a reading, there is a man of high influence that can not be overlooked.

Reversed keywords: tough but fair, hard, brutal, austere, rugged, severe, stern

A lion's head oversees the tarot deck's card of love. In the tarot deck there are men who are stage performers who dress almost in drag as a part of the act. Besides the obvious implications, we can dismiss this aspect of the card as nothing but the perverse style of evildoers.

The picture shows a young man and woman on a date. They took the day to share a romantic walk in the park. It is obvious by the way that they look at each other what they are thinking. They take a moment to toast to their love.

As they symbolically share a drink, the sign of their union appears between the cups. Twisting around the pole are 2 snakes that resemble a strand of DNA. It doesn't take a genious to figure out what these two are planning. We can only hope that they do the right thing and get married first.

Reversed keywords: lust, debauch, whoredom, prostitution, depraved, immoral, affair

A thief looks over his shoulder as he makes away with 5 of 7 swords. Just like the 10 of Wands, their owners were having supper. This heist is not as easy as grabbing 10 wands though. Swords are a lot harder to carry so he can only manage 5 of them. He treads lightly, knowing that anybody in those tents might notice their sword or their friend's walking away.

He is tiptoeing away from the scene of the crime, wishing that he was invisible. In Waite's Book of Black Magic, criminals are encouraged to do heinous spells of unimaginable evil. Waite, the maker of this tarot deck was a sinister occultist who was one of the most notorious proponents of evil that the world has ever known.

Knowing just a little about the twisted mind of Waite, we may assume that the fez-like cap the thief dons is most likely his hat of invisibility. The pathetic spell that the man must perform to even become invisible requires a night in the grave yard, where he must dig up a corpse and steal its hand, which then of course he puts in his pocket for good luck when he does crimes.

Reversed keywords: thief, violation, criminal, get away, burglary, heist, gambling, loss

A man feels tremendous shame due to an evil succubus robbing him of the oil of gladness. The terrible trauma of having been seduced by a demon causes a profound loss of dignity. To rub it in, the nocturnal emission is so evil that it totally ruins the sheets.

The swords that are mounted above the bed are a sign of extreme cruelty. The man's soul writhes in excruciating pain and agony, humiliated by the sick pleasure that he realizes that the sin has given him. As he facepalms in disgrace, the movie of the climax of his dream replays over and over.

The evil man may have secretly enjoyed and even prayed for the succubus visit. His greatest shame is that he has been caught in this cycle of sin for ever. He pretends to repent but can't break out of the loop.

Reversed keywords: imprisonment, failure, agony, nightmare, sorrow, pain, emotional torment, self-harm, dwelling on negatives

Famine has taken over the land bringing plagues and destruction. The king has fallen dead and his subjects have come to expect the same fate. The Pope or Hierophant stands up to Death when ordinary mortals bow.

The sun is setting between the gates, symbolic of the death of another day. Death rides into town on a pale horse, but this grim reaper is waving a flag instead of a sythe. On his flag we see satanic symbols of forbidden fruit sitting inside a five-pointed flower reminiscent of the pentagram.

The Death card is the most feared card in the deck, and for obvious reasons. Who wants to find out when somebody they know is going to die? Psychic readers will tell you every time that the Death card is not bad, but this is the biggest lie they can possibly tell. How much more lying do you think they do in an average reading?

Reversed keywords: evil omen, curse, destruction, end, finished, plague, sickness, injury, harm

A swift runner rides a wave of expedience. He skates across the top of the land as if it were ice, making it look easy. He is active and aware. He must be on full alert because his enemies could come at him from any direction at any time.

This guy is a real jerk, which should be fairly obvious due to his apparent lack of friends and abundance of enemies. He is quick witted and sinister in his insults. He takes pleasure not only in other people's misfortunes, but in selfishly having caused their misfortune himself.

He is paranoid because that's the position he puts himself in. Ordinary people spend their lives avoiding tense situations. The Page of Swords spends his life getting into tense situations. He is a born troublemaker.

Reversed keywords: unprovoked, blindsided, cowardice, sneak attack, hit from behind, Pearl Harbor

The gate of sunset seems to be the setting for a long dark path. This card is another bad omen. It shows a treacherous road if evolution from the point of view of a low life lobster. The ridiculous ideas of evolution that are suggested by this card are meaningless. A lobster will never evolve into a human being no matter how much time passes.

A dog and a wolf show that man's best friend is sort of a creation of creative breeders, so maybe evolution makes a small amount of sense. They are trying to suggest here that man is equal to God though and this is evil. The crusty crustacean will not make it up the mountains. It will naturally sink back to the slimy abyss that spawned it. This is where the nasty thing belongs.

Upright keywords: uncertain, unknown, dark, scary, dismal, gloomy, impromptu, on the fly

The patriarch of the Cups suit sits on his throne, which is adrift at sea. He is the king of the element of water. The extreme representation of him sailing the seas alone on his throne is as bold of a statement as if he could walk on water. Where is his kingdom? It must be under the sea.

His power is as solid as the foundation of his kingdom, which symbolically supports him. He must be as light as a feather if he doesn't want to sink. What good is a kingdom if it sits on the ocean floor?

Behind him on either side is a whale or large fish jumping out of the water and a ship sailing. He dons the dorkiest crown in the deck, looking like a real nerd. Perhaps that is why he seems so isolated and detached from his world.

Reversed keywords: dishonest, double-dealing, rogue, injustice, vice, scandal, considerable loss, looting

The suit of Cups started out so pure with the Holy Grail and love, but how quickly does love go too far. The caped crossdresser disguises his manhood to make it seem okay that he'ss going out for a night with the girls. The greatest shame here may be that maybe nobody would suspect the obvious.

An excess of love may run the risk of crossing the boundary of decency, as we see happening on this card. One woman is not enough for this fellow, who aspires to build a harem. He has a good start with these 2 young ladies as they party.

They fill their cups with the wine of excess. The days of the debauchery of the likes of King Solomon are long passed, but the spirit of such outlandish whoredoms has been reborn in recent years. Where this card comes up, it shows that there are people having too much fun.

Upright keywords: plenty, merriment, glad, victory, fulfilment, solace, celebration, rejoice, dancing