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The Egyptian Cross Tarot Reading

       
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The Egyptian Cross Spread

The Ankh

Like the Celtic Cross, here we have another evil pagan imitation of the crucifix mocking the holy alter. The ankh is like the Egyptian version of the cross, and likewise the Egyptian Cross spread is shaped in its form. The spread is also similar in working, except this spread goes deeper into the background of the question.

This spread has not 1, but 2 significators, the 2 crossing cards, #1 and 2. They are equally relevant. Going into the background is what this spread is meant to do, so the next 2 cards show the early causes of the situation followed by the triggering causes, the evil force that activated the dormant seed of the early causes. Higher perceptions, card #5 is actually supposed to represent what the LORD thinks about it all. This would be the card that really matters. Card #6 represents the concusion of the matter as far as what must take place according to divine fate.

The bottom pillar further exposes the outcome, but from the lower perspectives rather than the high above. The future is broken into 3 steps. The immediate future is card #7, the next step that is supposed to be right around the corner. Then card #8 shows the image of a surprising experience that comes after. The final card, as always shows the final outcome of the matter, in other words ultimate fate. But keep in mind that if you believe any of this stuff you are worshiping heathen idols.



The Egyptian Cross Reading

  Higher Perspective

King of Wands
 
Early Causes

King of Cups
  Triggering Causes

Knight of Swords
  Necessary Conclusions

5 of Pentagrams
 
Significator #1

6 of Cups
  Significator #2

Page of Wands
  The Next Step

2 of Pentagrams
 
  Surprising Experiences

The Chariot
 
  Outcome

Ace of Cups
 
   
In this spread there are 2 Significators. They may support or oppose each other.
   
Significator #1

6 of Cups

Children are at play in an old garden, symbolically stopping to smell the flowers. Children are not fully responsible for their actions because they can not help the fact that they have been ingrained with original sin. They must be taught not to chase their own evil passions, but to learn the difference between righteousness and wickedness. It is up to the adult to teach them because they are incapable of figuring it out.

Children playing is a good sign, perhaps the best sign of such a wreched deck of cards. It is a happy card to occur in a reading that points to joyous times of celebration.

Depending on the circumstances, this card can be very dangerous because of the possibility of innocence being corrupted. If it comes up near such negative signs, it may be a warning to protect your children. With the most valuable possession comes the potential of the greatest loss.

Reversed keywords: new friends, learning, change of environment, new experiences, growth

   
Significator #2

Page of Wands

The questionable attire that this guy flamboyantly flaunts makes me wonder about him. It's been a very extremely long time since it's been fashionable for men to wear tights in public. He lustfully gazes at the peak of the staff as he holds it in his hands like a baby. What a strange fellow he is.

He wears a derby with a prominent feather to symbolize that he is an accomplished individual, despite his appearance. He may in fact be merely eccentric because of the feather in his cap. Maybe that's why he's so happy that he prances around like Peter Pan.

It is obvious that he is a proud man. He is so proud in fact that he flaunts his style topping off flaming boots and tight tights by wearing a dress and even a cape! He is a performer, that's the reason why he dresses like that, it's just part of his job. What a strange job indeed.

Reversed keywords: schemes, conspiracy, bad news, indecision, instability, insecurity

   
Early Causes

King of Cups

The patriarch of the Cups suit sits on his throne, which is adrift at sea. He is the king of the element of water. The extreme representation of him sailing the seas alone on his throne is as bold of a statement as if he could walk on water. Where is his kingdom? It must be under the sea.

His power is as solid as the foundation of his kingdom, which symbolically supports him. He must be as light as a feather if he doesn't want to sink. What good is a kingdom if it sits on the ocean floor?

Behind him on either side is a whale or large fish jumping out of the water and a ship sailing. He dons the dorkiest crown in the deck, looking like a real nerd. Perhaps that is why he seems so isolated and detached from his world.

Reversed keywords: dishonest, double-dealing, rogue, injustice, vice, scandal, considerable loss, looting

   
Triggering Causes

Knight of Swords

The knight charges into battle ready to strike. This card suggests an extreme quarrel or fight. If it is supposed to mean a person, he is a man of action. Unfortunately his actions are totally destructive. He is up to no good. His mission of mayhem may have a mastermind behind it though.

An evil genius could possibly be sending this guy as muscle. The brains of the operation sends this guy to do the dirty work. Whatever the problem, we find this guy is sombody's problem solver. Even if the knight's mission is personal, he is there to do harm.

The position this card comes up in may show a brutal battle. An oppressive power rides in to take control by force. In his mind the ends justify the means, allowing him to convince himself that the excessive violence of his warpath is actually for the greater good!

Reversed keywords: aggressive, violent, battle, combat, derision, ruin, hypocracy, imperialism

   
Higher Perspective

King of Wands

Here we have the lizard king sitting on his throne. He is the supreme commander of the entire suit of Wands, the dominant male of the dominant suit of the Minor Arcana. He wears a red robe, as the ruler of the suit of fire. He bears the secret occult symbol of the lizard eating its own tail.

The king sits there as if he owns the world. He appears to be more of a passionate fan of his own work than anything else. He watches the action that he has set in motion play out for his own amusement. Any people under him are his pawns.

Whatever his whims, it is certain that the people will be the ones who bear the brunt of his decisions. Where this card appears in a reading, there is a man of high influence that can not be overlooked.

Reversed keywords: tough but fair, hard, brutal, austere, rugged, severe, stern

   
Necessary Conclusions

5 of Pentagrams

This is a card of harm and injury. Hobbling past the blasphemous stained glass window of the satanic church, 2 dejected souls freeze their toes in the snow. Desolation, hurt, pain and suffering are the essence of this card, one of the tarot deck's most evil omens.

They have been banished. Cut off from among their people, these 2 are permanently damaged by their own follies. The harm they have caused others comes back to them. The devil's church is right there to remind them that they are that close to the fire.

It seems like the ultimate torture knowing that it could all be so easy if they just gave up and went inside. But they are strong and determined, tough enough to make it through the cold night. They are well aware that they must endure the pain if they want to go to heaven.

Reversed keywords: disorder, chaos, discord, profligacy, sickness, ruin, injury, broken, beaten

   
The Next Step

2 of Pentagrams

Twice the evil is twice the fun. Also twice the trouble. This joker balances 2 pentagrams, waving his arms like the sea. His perverted sexual innuendo likens himself to a human penis. I will not explain the depraved meanings of his solo dance routine, so not to glorify his self-abuse. It is better not to give this desperate, depraved fool any attention.

He likens the sea to a giant body of flowing semen. This is noticable as he mimics the high tide with his enormous testicles. There is no mistake about it, not wearing that giant condom top hat. The card clearly represents the male mating dance ritual.

The man might be a male stripper as the party clown. There's a better chance that it is just some pathetic chronic masturbator though, a sick soul lustfully devouring itself. Whatever the case, the card is all about a guy with sex on the brain, wearing a condom hat as if his thoughts were erect.

Reversed keywords: gaiety, simulated pleasure, logical sense, writing, composition, exchanging letters

   
Surprising Experiences

The Chariot

The Charioteer rides from city to city stopping to make public speeches. His traveling podium conceals a permanent erection that is the driving force behind all of his speeches. Blatant phallic symbols decorate the crest of his podium suggesting flamboyant bisexuality coupled with sexual addiction.

The hypocrite driving this Chariot speaks against the temptations of sex while engaging in every act of debauchery that presents an opportunity. His limits know no bounds. Children and the mentally challenged present easy targets for the roving predator.

His draft animals are sphinxes that are mirror reflections and color inversions of each other. Criminals are criminals day and night, so remember that during the day they must at least appear legitimate. Watch out for this snake oil saleman, who has probably only rode into town looking for a victim. Whether he's selling sex, drugs, or rock and roll, just say 'No' to this bad apple.

Reversed keywords: con artist, crook, cheater, criminal, traffic, rogue, charlatan, poser

   
Outcome

Ace of Cups

In this card a creepy hand emerges from a cloud palming the base of a goblet. The cup in hand is purported to be none other than the Holy Grail! In a deck of cards that was founded on blasphemous imagery, nothing is sacred. Though nothing would seem to indicate any apparent evil signs in this card, it is just way too out of place in the deck of debauchery.

All of the symbolism of this card is holy imagery. The dove descending is seen as a sign from heaven. Perhaps the twisted mind who thought up the tarot deck conceived that since tarot readers share an universal love of evil, that evil would be good in their eyes. Therefore the sign of the Holy Grail pictured on the Ace of Cups must be construed as being a representation of the ultimate evil.

It is a confusing card, because if you understand the truth that the cup of Christ is the ultimate spiritual treasure, then you would not be using tarot cards or doing readings. As a practitioner of the most sinister evil, you must view this card as the worst reminder of what you have sacrificed.

Upright keywords: joy, content, satisfaction, nourishment, abundance, fertility, felicity, fullness

 
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